Too much faith

I've said on more than a few occasions that I do know that the universe doesn't give me anymore than I can handle. I just wish the universe didn't have so much faith in me.

The underlying feeling I've become aware of is that I was being punished for my successes and any movement forward in my attitude.

So, when I truly embraced the desire to focus on my spinal health through chiropractics and massage therapy, and really felt significant changes happening within me, I had a number of solid conflicts at work and with my family in Southern California that tested me fiercely.

I don't focus so much on the grief I'd felt coming back from Iraq. Yes, I still would like another deployment, but I don't have a burning feeling that I wouldn't be able to survive without one. 
I'm in a wonderful relationship in which I recognize where I need to work on myself and love and respect my partner. Honest communication is a first in a romantic relationship. Having a truly good man in my life is a first.
The next couple of years have so much possibility and nothing is written in stone. Normally this would terrify me, but I feel excited about it.

And, within 24 hours of bringing this all together during a wonderful session of honest talk with the best therapist ever, a small amount of random feces hit an oscillating cooling device with my family and confrontation happened at work.

I spent most of last night unable to sleep with my mind spinning with what I'd have to do, the sooner the better. And, today? Work place confrontations.

But, as I sat and thought about it, I didn't think of this a punishment, but the opportunity to free myself up from crap that had been  weighing me down. A chance to deal with stuff that has no place in my life and heal some old wounds that still oozed and hurt painfully at times.

So, the universe doesn't have too much faith in me. I had too little in myself.